Personality, Poems and Purpose

I was taking a walk recently when I realized that my two favorite poems have a connection, and I realized that they are my favorites because they echo what’s most important to me (second to Jesus, of course). And, I think, to all of humanity.

One of the poems is by the wonderful Mary Oliver. Here it is in full:

The Summer Day

Who made the world?

Who made the swan, and the black bear?

Who made the grasshopper?

This grasshopper, I mean—

the one who has flung herself out of the grass,

the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,

who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down—

who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.

Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.

Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.

I don’t know exactly what a prayer is.

I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down

into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,

how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,

which is what I have been doing all day.

Tell me, what else should I have done?

Doesn’t everything die at last, and too soon?

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

How does that last line strike you? It knocks me sideways every time. It makes me think about death and purpose and how to conduct my days. And how to pay attention.

Now, here’s my very favorite poem, by the transcendent Rainer Maria Rilke. He’s considered by many – including me – to be the finest poet of the 20^th century.

Archaic Torso of Apollo

We cannot know his legendary head
with eyes like ripening fruit. And yet his torso
is still suffused with brilliance from inside,
like a lamp, in which his gaze, now turned to low,

gleams in all its power. Otherwise
the curved breast could not dazzle you so, nor could
a smile run through the placid hips and thighs
to that dark center where procreation flared.

Otherwise this stone would seem defaced
beneath the translucent cascade of the shoulders
and would not glisten like a wild beast’s fur:

would not, from all the borders of itself,
burst like a star: for here there is no place
that does not see you. You must change your life.

The last sentence of this poem has haunted me since my first reading of it, years ago. And it’s supposed to. That’s the point.

The idea is that when you behold something perfectly beautiful, it challenges who you are and what you think about your life. You realize that you have not lived up to the potential within you. This statue’s perfection shines on all the dark, neglected corners of your existence and demands more. And in that moment, you are willing to give it.

Interestingly, this blog post isn’t really about my Enneagram type. This is more about my Meyers-Briggs type: INFJ.

The bigger questions are important to INFJs. The website 16Personalities describes them this way: “They tend to approach life with deep thoughtfulness and imagination. Their inner vision, personal values, and a quiet, principled version of humanism guide them in all things. Idealistic and principled, people with the INFJ personality type (Advocates) aren’t content to coast through life – they want to stand up and make a difference. For these compassionate personalities, success doesn’t come from money or status but from seeking fulfillment, helping others, and being a force for good in the world.”

And here’s the kicker: “…they dedicate themselves to the pursuit of purpose.”

That doesn’t exactly fit the standard description of an Enneagram Seven, does it? Maybe a Social Seven, but I’m dominant in Self-Preservation. Yet here I am. And that’s why I recommend learning about other personality models in addition to the Enneagram. You get a fuller understanding of what’s going on in that complex, marvelous brain of yours. The Enneagram is the most spot-on, comprehensive system I’ve found, and I love that it gets to the root of what motivates our behavior. But it doesn’t explain everything, so in this case, knowing my Meyers-Briggs type is helpful.

Everyone has a purpose

What do your favorite things, or what you focus on in your life, tell you about yourself? What do you prioritize and minimize and ignore? It’s a useful exercise to ask these questions. It at least helps you get clarity on why and how you spend your life. They may also help you gain insight into what level of control your personality type’s central fear is exerting over you.

And that’s really important, because it can help you pinpoint what your purpose is and what might be holding you back from fully walking in it. You don’t have to care about it as much as I do! But I hope you care about it at least a little, because God created each of us with a purpose, a way to contribute to his awesome plan for this earth.

Purpose doesn’t have to be huge. It doesn’t mean everyone is destined to become famous. It means that you have a particular set of skills, talents and experiences that are uniquely yours. You are the only you there will ever be! And the world needs you, even if you “only” have a small sphere of influence and never become well-known outside that sphere. You matter, and that’s why it’s vital that you take this journey of self-awareness.

It’s funny but also humbling to realize that none of us are as original as we’d like to believe! So, true to the dictates of my personality’s wiring, I wrote a whole book about personality and purpose. You can check it out here: https://amzn.to/2JqANMq.

And if you’d like twice-monthly insight, inspiration and information for your journey toward your true self and your purpose, click here to subscribe to my Dearly Beloved newsletter. When you do, you’ll also get a handy Enneagram Quick-Reference Guide that helps you keep all the details of this complex personality model at hand.

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